Merchant Crab

Olivia gasped and Suze let out a yelp.

The commander groaned in confusion.

But Balthazar didn’t make a sound.

The sudden burst of discomfort that had run through him was now replaced with a feeling of extra weight.

Part of it came from his body feeling much heavier than usual, but also because of the pressure being applied by the baton pushing down on his shell.

Huh… Why isn’t it hurting?

Twisting his eyestalks around, the crab saw the tip of the weapon pressed against the top of his shell, its spikes scratching fruitlessly on it but unable to pierce his chitin.

Not his usual chitin, however.

It was still gray as his carapace usually was, but with a shinier finish. A metallic texture to it.

“What is this?!” the bewildered commander exclaimed, still trying to push the baton down on the crab, unsuccessfully.

Balthazar looked at himself with almost as much bewilderment. “I’m… an iron crab.”

“What?!” said the human. “That’s… that’s illegal!”

“How’d you do that?!” exclaimed Suze, a few paces behind them.

“I’m not sure,” the metallic crustacean said. “I was hoping it would imbue my claw with iron, not my whole body.”

The frustrated guardsman finally pulled his weapon away and took a couple of steps back, breathing fast as he scowled at his suddenly sturdier opponent.

Balthazar checked his system status.

[Imbuing - Iron]

[Duration: 5 minutes]

[Effect: +5 physical defense. +5 unarmed damage. -5 speed.]

Hmm, that’s new. It’s not just an iron claw with extra damage anymore.

Feeling confident about his new buff, the crab stepped forward to taunt the human, but his legs faltered under the extra weight of his iron shell, dragging his pace.

Ah, damn it. Not a fan of the reduced speed, though.

“Al… alright, pal,” Balthazar said to the commander, trying to remain cocky as he slowly rolled forward. “I’ll overlook the… oof, this is heavy… the fact that you tried to dome me right there on account of you not thinking straight right now. I’ll let… let you get out of here unscathed if you start running now. Go on, shoo.”

The fuming man tightened his grip around the baton until his knuckles turned white, baring his teeth as he responded. “You want her all to yourself. I will never let you take her away from me!”

“Oh, for the love of…” the merchant sighed.

Yelling an overly dramatic war cry, the armored guard charged at Balthazar again, shield held forward as he brought the spiked weapon down on him once more.

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“Oh! Ow! Stop it!” the crab exclaimed as the human delivered thuds and clunks over his shell one after another, causing a barrage of system notifications to assault Balthazar’s vision.

[1 damage taken!]

[1 damage taken!]

[1 damage taken!]

[1 damage taken!]

[1 damage taken!]

“Just. Crack. Already!” the exasperated guardsman yelled between strikes.

As nice as his new iron shell was at reducing physical damage, Balthazar knew he couldn’t stand there taking hit after hit forever, even with all the extra points he had invested in Health.

Unfortunately, fighting someone head on wasn’t something he had much experience with. Not unless that someone was a tiny fish trapped in a puddle. Or the fight was a verbal one over the price of a pair of used boots.

“You’ve got claws, Balthazar!” Olivia shouted from the sideline. “Put ‘em up!”

“Oh, right, I’m a crab!”

Thrusting his pincer forward, the metallic invertebrate tried to reach for the man’s ankle—Balthazar’s signature move when it came to dealing with pesky humans bothering him.

Unfortunately, the local guardsman wasn’t as easily felled as some overburdened adventurer skipping rocks over a pond.

With trained reflexes, the commander blocked the crab’s strike with his round shield, hitting the tip of the pincer with a forceful bash.

“Ow! Right in the funny joint!” Balthazar cried, pulling his arm back.

The barrage of baton strikes resumed as the merchant did his best to shield himself with the other claw.

It wasn’t working out too well for him. While the iron provided him with increased defense and even some extra offensive potential—assuming he could make it connect—the speed penalty also made him a sitting duck for the man’s attacks.

And if there was something Balthazar couldn’t stand was being likened to any kind of bird. Sitting or otherwise.

[Health: 198/220]

That isn’t good either. I can’t just keep taking this forever until I hit zero.

The merchant tried to ponder his options amid loud bonks to the top of his shell. None of his skills seemed all that useful for his current situation, and after activating the imbuing skill it was not like he had much mana left to work with anyway. His Backpack of Holding was still dropped on the floor a few paces back and out of reach. Even if he could search it, he couldn’t think of anything in there that would rid him of the bothersome human trying to get to his soft insides.

“At least try hitting a different spot for a bit!” Balthazar exclaimed as another strike of the baton connected with his iron chitin. “I’m starting to go numb there!”

“I will never stop protecting my dame!” the tall man loudly declared as he brought his right arm up once again. “She will—Huh?!”

The commander spun around sharply as he felt a figure coming up behind him.

“Shut up already, white knight!” Olivia exclaimed as she hurled a teapot at his head.n/ô/vel/b//in dot c//om

It hit the front of his helmet straight on and shattered into countless ceramic pieces, but it wasn’t enough to knock him down, merely making him stumble back.

Until Suze appeared out of nowhere next to Balthazar and popped down on her hands and knees behind the man’s heels, making him trip and tumble back.

The commander fell on his cape and his helmet flew off his head, but his grip on the baton and shield remained strong.

Balthazar looked at Olivia with a baffled expression. “How do you keep finding all these things to smash on people’s heads?!”

“What?! There was a tea cart right outside one of the bedrooms over there!” the young woman exclaimed. “Would you prefer I hadn't smashed it on his head?”

Angry grunting interrupted their argument over the girl’s affinity for ceramic pieces as the commander stood back up onto his feet.

“Come here, you little brat!” the man yelled as he set his sights on Suze.

He raised his right arm, bringing the baton over the little girl as she scrambled to stand up.

Balthazar’s eyes widened. His shell was iron, her skin was not. He strained to reach forward, but before his heavy legs could take the first step, the crab felt a gust of wind zip past him as Olivia rushed to the other girl.

“Watch out!”

She tackled Suze out of the way just as the furious baton of the commander came down hard on the floor where she stood a second before, cracking the wooden floorboards under the rug.

The two girls tumbled and rolled on each other, both ending up sprawled with their backs on the floor, still within reach of the mad man.

“Fine,” the guardsman growled. “I’ll rid myself of the two of you in one go.”

The raised baton cast a shadow over Olivia’s face as her eyes widened, her back and elbows still on the floor.